Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Jobs that make me want to cry

Today, I stumbled across two job postings on my school's website that I'm not going to apply for.  I know, that sounds weird, but some things I just can't do to myself.  My standards are by no means high, but, for my mental health, I have to draw the line somewhere.

1) Associate position in small, decrepit, hellhole of a town*, in central Illinois.  
I have a lot of personal experience with this town, and I know this firm, so I know precisely what kind of hell this job would be.  Basically, I would be an ambulance chaser.  Which, in this particular town, means chasing one of their three ambulances fifty miles to the nearest real city.  Then, I would take the case of my uninsured, minority, client - who had recently moved to "small town" because his home in the Chicago projects was taken away.  Also, more than likely, he was in the ambulance because one of the locals shot him while he was robbing their house.  As an extra fun fact, can you guess what put this town on the local map a few years ago?  An ungodly high incidence of throat-syphilis (work through that for a minute).  Fuck this job.

2) Associate at no-name firm.
I don't have a problem with small firms - hell, I work at one now - but there's no-name and then there's no-name.  This firm is so small I actually can't find it.  The posting doesn't list an address, fax number or email.  I can't find a website or any information about it online.  I can't even find anything on the partner, other than his name on the ARDC website.  Apparently, nobody has heard of this firm.  Ever.  All I know, is that I'm supposed to call up and ask for an interview.  Am I going to interview at a shady, possibly non-existent, firm?  No fucking way. 

*On a side note, town's last bookstore just closed.  How sad is it if your town can't even keep a bookstore open?

1 comment:

  1. I might interview at the no-name firm, just for the "privilege" of interview experience. In this economy, you have to take whatever paltry experience you can get. Then again, I'm no lawyer.